On Self-Optimisation and Personal Branding

You know how people mention ideas, which then simmer in your head, until suddenly you are hyper-aware and start seeing them everywhere? My latest case is „self-optimisation“ and „personal branding“. Hearing about it has long raised my blood pressure, but now increasingly the hair on my neck. Why?

To start with, I understand that these are two sides of one coin: the underlying idea is that the individual is something that needs a lot of work to shine. And the outcome of that work will be measured and judged: internally and externally.

So, by that logic, we are called up to thrive to improve all parameters to get better results „self-optimisation“ and ratings „personal branding“.

The tantalising promises of self-optimisation

I admit, I am a big fan of self-optimisation. It is tantalising to imagine that you can fit all your dreams and ambitions into your one and only life!

It is the perfect poison: whatever you have, you can have more of it. And whatever is less than perfect, can be worked on.

You can „live your best life“, „be your best self“, „think you can do it, and you can“, whatever phrase of encouragement rules the day. So, if you run fast, you can train to run faster. If you are lacking in reverse parking, there are myriad ways to improve (in theory at least!). There is nothing to stop you to learn how to code, speak Swahili, run for presidency, or open a vegan pie shop.

Work toward appearances!

The next logical step is to work on your personal branding. Before graduation, students are advised to look after their personal branding. It is supposed to increase their chances of college admissions or job offers.

Of course, the general idea is not new: don’t make a fool out of yourself, stupid acts may come and haunt you for years, and people around you might know more about you than you think. While that was always true in a small village, we are now in a large global village, where the collective memory is simple uploaded to the net. Your mistakes big or small might possibly hang around for longer than yourself.

So, here is our perfect treadmill: optimise yourself and then be prepared for scrutiny. If „they“ google you, what will they find: are you doing your exercises? Are you a good student? Do you volunteer to save the hedgehogs? Make sure to get a certificate to add to your CV. In short, is not enough to live your life, you need to collect evidence and make it visible. To me it sounds super stressful and tiring.

Who wins the races?

As it is such a big task, should we get started right away and come up with a „strategy to optimise our self-branding and speed up our personal optimisation“?

I hope not. Clearly, it is a race that is impossible to win. Most likely, it is impossible to ever finish. It is like the hare and the tortoise. You are being worn out by the skewed set up.

If we step back, we realize that the idea of an omnipresent, all seeing and knowing entity has been around for a while. People used to – and some still do – pray for its forgiveness. That is because it is human to be anything but optimal.

To have accountability for our actions and behaviour is important, as we make us do things we do not enjoy for socially accepted norms. But then we need to consider, if we can accept those norms for our lives. There are a few things that are easier to accept than others.

Yes, clearing ice and snow in front of our houses so that our neighbours do not fall is not enjoyable but necessary. But do we need to modestly cover our shoulders to not offend the gods?

Who is setting the task?

I admit, quite often my first impulse on any requests to self-optimise is just like in the old days when I was a good student being assigned homework: „Yes! I can do this!“. Aww, and then to get approval and good feedback is so satisfactory! Isn’t it joyful to get good grades, gold stars, jobs? Shouldn’t it be equally satisfying to build a wholesome personal brand?

But once you start listening, you realise that all sorts of opinions are out there taking the liberty to assign their own benchmarks and measures of achievements as your task list: Be a top student! Volunteer! Win sports trophies! Serve the arts! Be creative! Be a leader! Eat more vegetables! Be taller!

My counter poison is authenticity

I need to stop and breath and think: what is important to me and why? Yes, I update my LinkedIn, and I avoid posting embarrassing photos on social media. I even step out to write a blog.

But I need to try to accept my limitations. There are plenty things I am no good at: I can’t catch a ball and if you need saving on skiers, don’t call me. I tried a coding course in Python and failed miserably. That won’t stop me learning new things. Every failure increases my admiration for people who master those skills.

Kindness and forgiveness

And if I get carried away, I try to remember: do I expect my friends and colleagues to be perfect? Don’t I like them just the way they are with all their strengths and weaknesses? Then maybe I should extend the same kindness towards myself?

Yes, there are nasty people out there. But I believe in general, most people are nice. So maybe we should assume that this imagined omniscient presence that is out there judging me, my internet presence, my achievements, my personal brand is kind and possibly forgiving.

That would mean, we just live the way we can and do not worry too much about optimising ourselves. Maybe we spend our energy on positive things like being kind to the next person. We could try to be more grateful for what is good and understanding for what is not.

Today, that seems to me like something I could practise more! What do you think?